Recent Posts – Page 28 – Career Life Institute

Deeper Well-being with Feng Shui

Feng Shui is the practice of healing one's exterior environment to bring about a major shift, and healing, of one's interior environment. So profound is this ancient art at accomplishing this, that most Chinese acupuncturists refer their patients to a Feng Shui practitioner who will follow up on their treatments by making corresponding adjustments in the patient's home.

Our homes and businesses hold our entire psyche, for good or ill, in a complex pattern of spatial, visual and sensual dynamics. The secrets of Feng Shui are now flooding into our western world, revealing the practical ways with which we can heal ourselves through changes we are willing to make in our daily living spaces.

Feng Shui wisdom instructs us to unclog the home of all of the stagnant clutter and excess objects which drag our energy down and stop the "Ch'i", or vital life energies, from flowing smoothly. If done well, this can have the same healing effect as a giant colonic, removing years of toxic psychological residue from our lives. The next step is to switch to living surrounded only by what we love, with a healing effect on us that is similar to the effect of eating healthier, more nourishing foods.

Feng Shui's remedies for structural no no's, such as slanted ceilings, oppressive overhead beams, etc., will give an immediate chiropractic benefit to us. Finally, placing visual cues throughout our environment which affirm our new healing visions for ourselves will hold those visions in as gentle, subtle and powerful a manner as hypnotherapy does. These are just a few of the healing modalities which precision Feng Shui can complement and reinforce.

If the essence of well-being is to heal the whole body and whole mind together, we can no longer overlook the great power for healing which lies in our homes and work spaces. Let your spaces hold your highest visions of harmony and abundance, becoming spatial affirmations of your goals with Feng Shui.

Karen Carrasco is an Essential Feng Shui consultant. You can contact her at fengshui@humboldt1.com, or call (707) 825-8859, with your questions or interests.

Life’s Little Goodies: Popularity

The questions I get in the mail often amaze me, and I get enough odd questions that it doesn't surprise me to get them anymore. Still, I occasionally get taken aback. The question asked of me below is one that made me lean back in my chair and go "huh?"

"How do I become more popular?"

Call me Dear Abby. I do try to answer all my mail and anyone that would ask that question of a stranger obviously really wants some advice. So, what do you say to a question like that?

After a bit of a disclaimer about my qualifications to answer that question, I said this…

Being popular, to me, is simply being likeable. I think being likeable means:

To like yourself.
Not in a vain-glory way, but just liking who you are on the inside. If you don't like yourself, imagine how much harder is it for others to like you.

To listen.
Everyone has a need to talk. Those that really listen will always have someone to talk with – and notice, I said talk "with" not "to".
Don't talk too much about yourself.
Bragging, constantly talking about yourself, and other forms of egotism are boring. If you don't believe that go look in the mirror and look yourself in the eye and tell you how wonderful you are. You'll get tired of it quickly, so do others.

To be interesting to others is simply to be interested in others more than you are in talking about yourself.
Smile!
Sounds simple, and it is, but people like people who smile at them. It makes them smile and smiling makes you feel happy. If you smile when you first see someone, and each time you first see them, there's a good chance they'll like you just because they make you smile. It makes them feel good about themselves.
Be generous of spirit.
It doesn't matter how good a person feels about themselves, it's always nice for them to know others appreciate their talent, accomplishments, personality, attitude, uniqueness, etc. There are hundreds of things you can compliment someone about, just be genuine and don't go overboard with it. Insincerity can be sensed.

Genuinely complimenting someone costs you nothing, but to the recipient, it's something that can't be bought at any price.
Be slow to be critical.
I probably get one letter critical of my web site or newsletter for every 99 that compliment me. It still thrills me to receive compliments and still bothers me to be criticized. I know you can't please everyone, but I'm human and that's the way we are. (Added note: another shattered illusion, huh? Some of you thought I really *was* an alien.)
Don't try too hard to be liked.
Those that do are often perceived in negative ways – like emotionally needy, overbearing, insincere, or many other things that will put distance between you and others. Not everyone will like you, just as you're not going to like everyone. In those cases, accept that and move on.
Don't be a whiner!
No one wants to listen to constant complaining, fault-finding and holier-than-thou attitudes.
Don't talk negatively about others.
Others will realize if you talk badly to them about others behind their back, you'll also speak poorly of them when they're not around.
Don't talk too loud.
A whisper is heard better than a shout.

So how'd I do? What are your keys to popularity and friendship?

"We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak." – Epictetus

"Popularity is a crime from the moment it is sought; it is only a virtue where men have it whether they will or no." – George Savile

Visit his website at www.boogiejack.com – and find help along with a

sense of humor at this resource for do-it-yourself webmasters. Boogie Jack provides professional grade graphics, html and graphics tutorials, and much more. Spend some time and check out the entertainment and fun things like the "guess the celebrity" contest.

Functional Fitness

Carmen is 70 years old and never misses her workout. She has to coordinate her transportation every week since she doesn't have a car, and she's glad to do it for the "functional fitness" level she can attain. Carmen can carry her own groceries, walk to her mailbox with ease, climb a flight of stairs without getting winded, and pick up and play with her grandchildren. Carmen takes aqua aerobics two times a week and wouldn't miss the leg lifts, the biceps curls and the water walking. What Carmen really enjoys are the great people in her class and the positive "can do" attitude of the instructor. She sees her successes as she gets stronger and enjoys the challenge of finding her potential safely. This is best air rowing machine "functional fitness," and it's worth the commitment to Carmen.

Frank has had lower back pain for years. There were many days when he could never find a comfortable position whether walking, standing or sitting down. His daughter gave him a massage gift certificate for his birthday, and he reluctantly went in for a massage; and he experienced some relief. With regular massage, yoga stretching and a few back-strengthening exercises, Frank can now manage his back pain. This is another example of "functional fitness."

What are some of the advantages of functional fitness? British researchers discovered that individuals who engage in aerobic exercise score significantly higher on creative thinking tests then non-exercisers.

A study of 172 health club members in Lasik New York, revealed that new members joined clubs to improve their health and appearance, but long-term members stayed because exercise improved their mood. A study of 1,741 University alumni showed that middle age people with healthy lifestyle habits e.g. Functional Fitness, not only live longer, but are less sick and dependent on others when they get older; by the time they were 75 years old, the healthiest participants had half the disabilities of the least fit.

Functional fitness means not smoking, watching your weight, and exercising regularly. It also means taking care of your pain and strengthening weak muscle groups to maintain your pain-free health. It means moderation, consistency, supportive friends, and qualified leaders.

Find a facility that has programs for all ages, sizes and levels of intensity. Getting started is up to you. Staying up with it is up to you. Your health is up to you. So make it functional and fun.

By Susan Jansson, HealthSPORT (Arcata, California) susanj@humboldt1.com

Communication Differences Between Men and Women

At our May BUSINESS CONNECTIONS meeting, Kathleen Preston, retiring Psychology Professor from HSU, shared some interesting ideas about how differently men and women are perceived and how their communication styles differ-real and imaginary. Kathleen pulled this information from two authors, Nina Colwill and Debra Tannen:

SOME ASSUMPTIONS MADE ABOUT
WOMEN AND MEN:

Beliefs still persist that men are more competent than women, so when in doubt, people usually defer to a man
Competent women are not seen as likeable, especially unattractive women
Women's successes and failures are often interpreted differently than men's:
– women's success: luck and effort; men's success: ability
– women's failure: lack of ability; men's failure: bad luck
Women tend to have less Power-both public and personal
Status is partly determined by gender alone
Women are often perceived as more "alike" each other-lumped together as though they look alike
Women have fewer mentors in business than men

DIFFERENCES IN MEN'S AND WOMEN'S
COMMUNICATION STYLES:

The good news is no difference in abilities or achievement, and few other "personality" differences. There are differences in:

Non-verbal Communication:
– Men are different in "space, eye contact and touching
– Women pay more attention to non-verbal cues and they smile more, are very expressive, and polite.

Verbal Communicators:
– Men usually set the topic, interrupt more and hold the floor longer
– Women follow the set topic and tag on comments

Attitudes:
– Men are interested in power and control; they are more direct and confrontational
– Women are usually more task oriented; they are more indirect and manipulative

Strategies to Influence:
– Men "report-talk": more public, information giving, want to "fix-it," lecture, tell jokes, brag, look for chances to challenge
– Women "rapport-talk": more private, good at listening and understanding, offer support, look for similarities and look for chances to learn. Bragging is not OK

SUGGESTIONS TO WOMEN:

Be alert to different styles
Use the tools you have-flexibility, monitoring, caring, cooperation, ability to handle multiple tasks, etc.
Consciously increase your personal power-decrease vulnerability and get support
Know your worth and expect to get rewarded for your work
Support other women.